- enjoyyouritalian
- Sep 4
- 4 min read
Updated: Sep 5
You’ve learned things like "i giorni della settimana", "i numeri", "i colori"... You can understand many of the phrases you read in Italian. You reached level 41 of your language app that cheers you up every time.
But still, every time you attempt talking in Italian, you freeze and feel like you can't really handle a conversation in Italian.
Why do I freeze when attempting speaking Italian?
Because our brain needs to practice what a sentence does in a specific context. Something like "Prego, entra pure" said by a local Italian welcoming you in their house is supposed to make you say "Grazie" and accept the invitation. The meaning doesn't rely in the sentence itself, but in the outcome it produces in real life. We need to understand what to say in certain situations in order to produce a certain outcome.
This is not easy as adults because we start worrying about how we sound, what other people think about us when we talk, what we would say in our first language, and we don't tolerate not understanding every single bit of the conversation. All this contributes to create mental blocks and insecurities. As a consequence, the easiest and most comfortable thing to do in order to avoid the embarrassment is to hide behind a language app that will give us the "illusion of learning to speak".
Tip: Count down 5,4,3,2,1... and immerse yourself in Italian language experiences. Start watching Italian movies with no subtitles and no goal to understand everything, and start saying aloud simple sentences. Your "language learning brain" craves this!
Here’s a gem: Does your brain make you translate and play app games? It doesn't mean that is what it needs. After all, when your brain makes you procrastinate is it because it actually needs it?
Why do I feel mentally drained every time I speak Italian?
If you are an habitual user of language apps, every time you attempt speaking Italian you probably think "How would I say this in my first language?" without realizing that it doesn't matter and it's not worth going down that pathway. Here is why:
Reason 1 - People from different countries express themselves differently from each other not only because they speak a different language, but because they have a different way of life. That is the beauty of the world! Every language is deeply intertwined with its own culture that produces a certain way of behaving and speaking.
Reason 2 - Every time you attempt translating from your first language (e.g. English) to the one you're learning (e.g. Italian), you may think it's the natural way but you are actually asking your brain to make a massive effort that will easily produce a disappointing result such as a non-sense sentence that is going to create nothing but a misunderstanding.
Tip: If you want to learn speaking Italian effectively in real life, you need to put your language app aside and start practicing the real conversation. Not sure where to start? Count down 5,4,3,2,1... and just start!
Here’s a gem: Disengage from thoughts like "How would I say this in my first language"? Instead, focus on something like "How can I ask for a fork to this waiter using the words available to me right now"?
How can I stop freezing and feeling drained when speaking Italian?
The answer is simple but it requires you stepping out of your comfort zone like you need to do in order to get anything worthwhile in this life. Otherwise it's like asking yourself "How can I learn swimming without making any effort?" Well, as grown ups, we all know the answer!
You are the only one who can make the decision to take a leap and have a go! As soon as you have the impulse to say something in Italian to a waiter at dinner, just do it without thinking much. It may come out weird and full of imperfections, and it's totally fine because otherwise how could you improve? It's like learning to swim: how could you have become a good swimmer if you didn't have any chance to see what went wrong?
After your first attempt, have a go again and push yourself to say something in Italian. You will find that it gets easier every time. After a while, you will start understanding the context, grasping the purpose of a conversation and say something that makes sense while improvising and adjusting your tone and pronunciation as you go. But remember: you cannot keep choosing "the psychological comfort of language apps" as it will make you go back to question yourself and get you stuck.
Do you wish you could feel more confident at speaking Italian? Count down 5,4,3,2,1... and join my "Italian for Fashion Lovers" workshop to practice real conversation in the context of clothes shopping and get the confidence you deserve while having loads of fun! Click here below for details: